Wednesday, 18 March 2015
I bought these seeds from the charity shop yesterday, they all have good plant by dates, some as far ahead as 2018, I also made a decision. I start my shift at 1pm and live around 12 minutes away from it. So when I found myself still in my slouchy clothes at 12.35 I thought something was probably a bit wrong. I just didn't want to go, but go I did.
When I arrived I found the words "I don't want to work here anymore" come out of my mouth! I talked with the manager for a little while and we came to a compromise. To be honest, I think it suits me more than her but there you have it, yesterday was my last Tuesday and I'm going to continue with my Wednesday shift to see how it goes. I felt bad for a little while, until the things that I don't like about being there on a Tuesday started to happen (as they always do) and I felt better about my decision.
As the summer will be here in the not too distant future I think, if things go well, that I might offer to fill in the odd shift here and there as holiday cover if needed. I think that would suit me and would at least be of some use to the shop. That's my problem at the minute you see, I don't feel as though I have the balance between being useful to the charity and getting some satisfaction from it myself. I never just wanted to be stuck behind the till, but that's how it has worked out. I know selling things is really important but it can also be a bit boring. I like to be doing bits of fetching and carrying, cleaning, tidying etc but as I was the only one out of three of us who could use the till properly I couldn't do anything else. It's frustrating to be the person "working" when the others are just chatting to customers or just standing around looking for things to buy for themselves.
I don't think I feel better or worse about it today, what I do know is that I'm already showered and dressed.